retro roles in relationships

Roles in relationships are rarely explicitly defined- most couples fall into roles that draw from the best & worst of their family histories. Those roles aren’t reviewed strategically, and are only discussed when frustration or resentment trigger an argument (or ongoing conflict).

In couples therapy all of the couples I work with have challenges directly created by poorly defined or disputed roles.

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Emotional Labour of Fake Smiles

Emotional labour is the energy & effort required to perform the task of managing emotions for self & others, so how does it affect relationships?
In the context of relationships, emotional labour includes a whole shit load of work performed to make sure others feel emotionally ‘comfortable’.

This piece will unpack some of the fuckery that comes with that work, and some of the common relational patterns arising from emotional labour.

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